


Tears Of Roses

by HoneyOcean



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Fluff, How Do I Tag, Insecurity, M/M, Slow Burn, they gay thats all really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-21 02:08:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16150301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoneyOcean/pseuds/HoneyOcean
Summary: Cyrus looked in the mirror. He couldn't understand why someone as perfect as TJ would love him.Also: My baby boys need hugs





	Tears Of Roses

**Author's Note:**

> This probably sucks but oh wellllll. Follow my tumblr// tj-lemon // if you want to

 

_**(If anyone is uncomforable with insecurities like appearances, weight, or other things then please don't read this. Also, this IS a happy ending so uwu <3 lmfao )** _

_**CYRUS POINT OF VIEW** _

TJ was the definition of beauty with his blonde hair, outrageously tall height, and a smile that could make the planets stop. I feel hopeless next to him. I can hardly reach the top of his head while he can rest his chin on mines. 

_Maybe if I was taller I could look just as handsome as him._

_Maybe if I dyed my hair, or lost weight then I could look fine._

_Maybe...._

"Are you okay muffin?" TJ asked with sincere worry, his voice cracking through the seams. 

 _Look, you caused him to worry about you!_ Quickly, I responded while my head chirped up like a pigeon. "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

"You just..." the other boy's head turned to the group while his hands shaked, "...haven't been talking much recently. Did I do something wrong? Oh gosh, if I did then I'm terribly sorr-"

My heart dropped at the sight of my boyfriend. He went from smiling to having a face of pain and sorrow in a matter of a heartbeat. I couldn't tell him about how I'm feeling. Nor can I tell my parents because they would force me to discuss my "stuff" with them. 

"TJ stop! It's nothing that you did wrong. Don't worry." My smile was so wide it made my eyes crinkled. I cringed to myself at the thought of lying, but it's for everyone's own good. They don't need to be constantly worried about me. I'm fine. 

I'm fine.

My thoughts were interrupted by a hand grasping mines. Our eyes meet and for once I feel safe; calm almost. The constant world war inside of me dies for a second whenever I see TJ.

I wouldn't mind fighting forever with myself if I can see him gleeful everyday. 

///

The next day was as horrific as the last. I walked into the Spoon as usual. Buffy, Jonah, TJ, and Andi were all there so basically the Good Hair Crew plus two. We all sat comfortably inside and around the booth and they ordered their usual. Everyone brought tator tots and milkshakes, besides Buffy who insisted on eating a hamburger now every single time we arrive. I couldn't bring myself to eat any tators so I settled on water. 

My stomach was doing somersaults and cartwheels. It can't be that hard to skip a meal, right? I mean, people do it all the time and most of them become models! No one will notice for sure if I keep up with the conversation. Wait, what were we discussing again? 

Everything was going smoothly until Buffy leaned towards me, making me feel glued into the seat. I leaned back as far as possible and avoided any awkward eye contact. I'm positive the salt shaker and I had a stare off.   
  
"Why aren't you eating anything today?" Buffy asked but it came out more as a command.

"Yeah. No baby tator theater?" Andi quickly follows.

Everyone stared at me like I held the truth about anything possible. Buffy and Andi hardly blinked and I could feel a cold sweat dripping down my neck. TJ remained silent but I swear you can hear his pulse picking up in pace. 

"Tator tot preformers need breaks from preforming too, you know." 

They weren't buying the excuse at all.

"Cy, if you aren't feeling okay we can leave. We can walk you home if you would like to?" Jonah asked with a face of anxiety whelmed inside. 

Everyone worrying about me only made me feel worse. I don't want to disappoint more people than needed. My brain tried to come up with an excuse as fast as it possibly could. 

"Oh-Oh shoot look at the time! I forgot....to go to..to my house to sleep! See you guys tomorrow!" 

"Underdog wait!" 

I walked out of the restaurant before I could even turn around. The only place I want to be right now is the swing set. It's where I feel free from my inner thoughts, even if it's just for a few moments. 

The constant swaying made me lost time and soon I was in my own world.

"Cyrus! I looked everywhere for you!" 

The sound of the swings creaking back and forth was disturbed by TJ. His hair was going in several directions and his eyes were beet red. He looked like he was on the verge of tears. 

"Guess you found the trash than pirate." I assume this wasn't the time for my self-depricating jokes. The empty swing besides me was filled up and soon swaying into the wind. The most uncomfortable silence roamed between us as we avoided the situation. It's obvious neither of us knew how to bring it up. 

"So... are you okay? Wait, that's a stupid quesion. Cyrus, we've been dating for three months now. You know you can tell me what's bothering you. Please... just open up to me a little. It doesn't have to be now or tomorrow. Just don't suffer alone. I love you." 

My cheeks turned into a cherry color and my heart swells. 

"A-am I enough? You're incredible and the most beautiful person in the world. I don't understand why you would date someone like me. You could date any boy or girl in the world and you chose me. Why? Don't you want someone better?" 

"Muffin. You're all I need. No one has chocolate eyes like you or your adorable smile. Your height is perfect for cuddles and our hand fits like a glove. Not do I but everyone can see you're amazing. Don't ever change yourself to be who you are not." Tears roll down his face and so do mines. We look at each other for what seems like an eternity before giggles fills up our throats. Our sorrows are replaced with joy as our lips connect like magnets to a fridge. It isn't a long kiss, but it was soft and gentle. His toothy smile meets mines as our hands touch.

One day my insecurities will all be a painful memory with a happy ending. 

 

 


End file.
